snowtracdave Posted May 11, 2013 Share Posted May 11, 2013 This week I saw an ad on Milweb for something I've recently been looking for . Now we've had a bit going on over the last couple of weeks with a death in the family , a funeral and of course , work to keep going , so spare time has been somewhat scarce . Anyway , the ad was still there after a day or three so I contacted the seller to establish that the item was still available and it was . I went on to explain that unfortunately I wouldn't be able to get to him until this weekend as I had a close family funeral to attend but made it clear that I would buy and he indicated that this arrangement was acceptable and that I would call before the weekend to set a time and get final directions , leaving him my name , full home address , landline and work mobile phone numbers . The seller gave no indication that anyone else was interested or had called . I contacted him again yesterday , again apologising for the delay but explaining that I could be with him at a time to suit him today . The reply came " Ah , well , I got somebody else coming to look now and they're pretty keen to have it so I'll give you a ring about half eleven if he doesn't have it" Needless to say I've heard nothing and I am a little miffed . I realise that I am somewhat old fashioned about these things and probably stuck in the past still trying my best to be courteous and well mannered in my dealings but if I agree something with a potential buyer then I stick to it , I don't say to the next caller ok you can have it then or is this acceptable in the present world ? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
RattlesnakeBob Posted May 11, 2013 Share Posted May 11, 2013 well..I say he should have called you up before letting the other fella in on it....that'd be the decent thing to have done and that's what I would have done... ....but seeing the other side as well.....as my old Grandad would have said.... "sold ain't sold til the moneys in your hand my boy.. first man through the gate with the money gets the deal" ....... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Hoseman Posted May 11, 2013 Share Posted May 11, 2013 guys obviously a pr#ck! send him a bill for wasting YOUR time and for him WASTING OXYGEN!! thats my rant caus hate tools who cant be arsed to pick up fone and keep you in the loop. sorry for strong language, i understand some people on here are delicate...........!!!! lol:-D Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Adrian Barrell Posted May 11, 2013 Share Posted May 11, 2013 Unfortunately, it is far more common that the prospective buyer never comes to look, phones back or ever makes contact again, despite a promise to buy. Sadly, not everybody is as straight as you Dave and the seller has no way of telling the good from the bad. I would ring him up and ask, you never know! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
fesm_ndt Posted May 12, 2013 Share Posted May 12, 2013 (edited) I can see both sides of the fence on this one also as like Adrian said a lot of tyre kickers out there and if he's had that type once too many before he isn't going to believe a buyer until the cash is in his hands. I got a couple of mates in the UK that sell stuff and the stories they tell me I wouldn't have the patience. On the buyers side of the issue the worst I seen is you have agreed on a price etc, you go back to bank the cash for them and they let out "oh well dicko offered me 50 quid more so I sold it to him..... do you want to offer me 100 quid extra!!!" It's much better dealing with the old gents with a handshake. Not saying you got to be old to have integrity, as there are also old buggers where after the handshake you have to count your fingers to make sure they haven't pinched one :-D Edited May 12, 2013 by fesm_ndt Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
andym Posted May 12, 2013 Share Posted May 12, 2013 I've had private sellers and a well-known dealer agree a sale by 'phone or email and then sell to someone else before I could get there. I'm afraid I just don't trust anyone now until I know them. Andy Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
paulbrook Posted May 12, 2013 Share Posted May 12, 2013 (edited) Its not great is it? I think that bad habits have increased in recent years although thankfully the vast majority of deals are nicely old-school. I tend to be at the seller end, and have had rather too many bad experiences I fear. These days it is dead easy to send money around and an exchange of emails are admissible evidence in the law if it ever came to that, so these days I often ask for a deposit then confirm back by email my undertaking to supply whatever it is that is changing hands, maybe even with a photo. Ebay (vehicles) is particularly problematic in my experience and I now say that I will not accept cash on collection as 3 times now I have had folks who bought something when the hammer came down come along and start viewing the vehicle as if they are considering buying it and one even had the cheek to make me a much lower offer than the hammer price. So sadly folks, with buyers like that is it any wonder that sellers take a first come (and pay) first served attitude? I think that like so many things open communication is the key to avoiding disappointment. Edited May 12, 2013 by paulbrook Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
simonm Posted May 12, 2013 Share Posted May 12, 2013 Can I offer a bit of Karma .. I came close to buying a house, there was another interested party who the seller had promised to give a further 5 days to come up with the funds, they had been trying for months. We didn't have a problem and expected to get the house. But we were dissapointed and we all acted honoroubly. 6 months later the house was on the news under water... While we had gone on to buy another house that is just about as high in Kent as you can go Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ferretfixer Posted May 13, 2013 Share Posted May 13, 2013 A Chap in a pinstriped suit & Trilby hat, approached me at a show once. He offered to sell me a watch, some nylon stockings (No good to me, as I don't wear them!) or some paper coupons, as he called them. Should I trust this man? His manner was 'Nervous' & I thought he looked a little shifty. He kept looking left & right as he was talking. Apart from that, he seemed a really nice sort of 'Gentleman'. He said his name was Viv, I didnt catch his Surname. But it sounded like spiv, or something like that! If I were to see him again, do any of you think it would be worth taking him up on any of his offers?...........:laugh: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Tony B Posted May 13, 2013 Share Posted May 13, 2013 I'm suprised you got a word in to make an offer! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ferretfixer Posted May 13, 2013 Share Posted May 13, 2013 Tony, he kept following ma along as he was talking as well. That put me off a little!..........:cool2: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
John Comber Posted May 13, 2013 Share Posted May 13, 2013 Going back to Snowtracdaves original post/question , whilst I am all for traditional word of mouth and handshake deals, I am afraid there seems far too many people today who don't even know how to shake hands!! So have no idea of good manners nor be able to even pronounce etiquette, so what chance do we have!! My only advice in today's world as a buyer is act as you see the advert to view and pay there and then on the deal done. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
snowtracdave Posted May 13, 2013 Author Share Posted May 13, 2013 Well , I must assume that the item in question was indeed sold on Saturday as the 'gentleman' has not responded to my messages or returned my calls . My response to the advice below in regard to answering an advertisement as quickly as possible and travelling cash in hand post haste is that in normal circumstances that it exactly what I would have done but the small matter of having to cremate a close member of my family and be at hand for their nearest and dearest meant that that was not immediately possible - hence the - as I thought - agreement with the seller to make my purchase as soon after the funeral as possible . Another time I will assume , as clearly seems to be the case , that there is very little honour left in the world of commerce and society has indeed degenerated to the point where it is every man for himself in all matters . Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
R Cubed Posted May 18, 2013 Share Posted May 18, 2013 Well I am with you on this if I ring and do a deal on the phone I mean to stick to it and I would expect the other party to do the same. Just because that's how the world is changing to who comes first with the money regardless of arrangements over phones ect does not make it right, it just goes to show you are better than them....and maybe it was not meant to be, could be a blessing in disguise. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
griff66 Posted May 18, 2013 Share Posted May 18, 2013 thats why papal is quite good say 100 quid deposit shows intent from at least the buyer! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
gazzaw Posted May 19, 2013 Share Posted May 19, 2013 Yep quite agree with R Cubed #14 above. happened on here to me recently, in the classified for sale section where I agreed to buy and got reply with email address and asked for details to send money etc and to arrange pick up by courier THEN nothing not even a reply why it has changed etc. see 216 engine for sale in the classified for full trail. an agreement on here should be honoured as an electronic handshake - maybe we need a walk of shame section to name and shame defaulters lol. gary Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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