news British (vintage) vehicle wiring theory

[Grasshopper]

I found this electrical theory (which many of us will be familiar with!) on this company's website http://www.dynamoregulatorconversions.com/

 

(Please note I have no connection or affiliation with this company)

 

The following just about sums up old and worn electrical components as fitted to British cars pre 1960.

 

 

 

Positive grounding depends on proper circuit functioning, which is the

transmission of negative ions by retention of the visible spectral

manifestation known as smoke".

 

This has been referred to as the smoke theory as when the smoke comes

out its finished, cooked or done for.

 

Smoke is the thing that makes electrical circuits work. We know this

to be true because every time one lets the smoke out of an electrical

circuit, it stops working. This can be verified repeatedly through

empirical testing.

 

For example, if one places a copper bar across the terminals of a

battery, prodigious quantities of smoke are liberated and the battery

shortly ceases to function. In addition, if one observes smoke escaping

from an electrical component such as a Lucas voltage regulator, it will

also be observed that the component no longer functions. The logic is

elementary and inescapable!

 

The function of the wiring harness is to conduct the smoke from one

device to another. When the wiring springs a leak and lets all the smoke

out of the system, nothing works afterwards.

 

Starter motors were considered unsuitable for British motorcycles for

some time largely because they consumed large quantities of smoke,

requiring very unsightly large wires.

It has been reported that Lucas electrical components are possibly

more prone to electrical leakage than their Bosch, Japanese or American

counterparts. Experts point out that this is because Lucas is British,

and all things British leak. British engines leak oil, British shock

absorbers, hydraulic forks and disk brake systems leak fluid, British

tyres leak air.

 

Therefore, it follows that British electrical systems must leak smoke.

Once again, the logic is clear and inescapable.

In conclusion, the basic concept of transmission of electrical energy

in the form of smoke provides a logical explanation of the mysteries of

electrical components especially British units manufactured by Joseph Lucas, Ltd

 

And remember: "A gentleman does not motor about after dark".

 

Joseph Lucas The Prince of Darkness 1842-1903

 

 

The Lucas motto: Get home before dark.

 

Lucas is the patent holder for the short circuit.

 

Lucas - Inventor of the first intermittent wiper.

 

Lucas - Inventor of the self-dimming headlamp.

 

The three-position Lucas switch--DIM, FLICKER and OFF.

 

The other three switch settings--SMOKE, SMOULDER and IGNITE.

 

The Original Anti -theft device - Lucas Electrics.

 

 

[Gordon_M]

Not wrong, absolutely not wrong :red:

[Lauren Child]

It translates to modern electronics.

 

It's often said that the little computer people that reside within the microchips breathe magic smoke. When the smoke gets let out they asphyxiate, so the computer stops working.

 

Smoke is often let out by Smoke Emitting Diode's (a close cousin of Light Emitting Diode's or LEDs) in the process of becoming a Friode (the black ones) or Light Emitting Resistor (the reddish ones that are hot to touch).

 

This also supports the theory that lightbulbs suck dark. Dark can be seen entering the environment as smoke at power stations and the like. When the lightbulb is turned on it sucks all the dark away, except that which is caught up on furniture and fixings (called a shadow). This is piped back to the power station in a continuous cycle. Batteries can be used to store dark until they are full, when they cease to function.

 

Candles can prove this - if you light a candle it's quite inefficient as much of the dark is lost back into the environment as smoke, but if you blow it out you can clearly see dark has been pulled into the wick and it's blackened. The same happens with wood.

 

The release of magic smoke (containing dark) normally leads to a greasy smear of dark due to the friction of it leaving. It's this friction that both leaves the smear and causes heat to be generated.

Edited November 18, 2013 by Lauren Child

[Chris Suslowicz]

I remember this item on eBay, fortunately someone preserved the listing. Enjoy!

 

http://www3.telus.net/bc_triumph_registry/smoke.htm